Tuesday, September 11, 2012

25 Years Worth of Today

Today is my daughter's birthday.

I'm aware that this day, 9/11, lives in memory for some as a day of devastation, and loss.  Yet for me, I cannot see this day as anything other than a reminder of the celebration of life.  It is the anniversary of a day when my life was graced with a tiny bundle of light and joy.  She amazes and inspires me, my daughter.  She has been my greatest teacher.  The reason I love as I do is because of her, and what she gave me.  As soon as she entered my world, everything changed, inside and out.  Love...walked into my life, and evoked my heart, and I haven't looked back since.

I wrote the following to my daughter not long ago, and I decided to share it here with you because I simply can't contain a love so great as I have for my daughter.  So I let it spill out of me for all to see:

Happy Birthday, Boo.  

~~

I remember:

The very first time I felt you move in the womb.
The first time I held you in my arms.
When you found your feet
The angelic, wispy, baby curl that laid delicately on the back of your neck.
The scent of you.
The first time you smiled at me.
Your first step...away.  When you finally let go.
The first time I kissed one of your tears away from your precious cheek. 
It's salty taste.
Watching you play with wooden spoons...in the mud.
The brightness of your eyes when you'd climbed out of your crib.
The first time you climbed a tree...and how proudly your face glowed.
When you learned how to ride your bike without training wheels.
The wind in your hair.
You swinging those bars...WOW!  A thing of beauty.
The beauty and grace of the lines of your body on beam.
Your expressive, clinging, toes 
Reading you stories.
Storm chasing together.
Riding a horse for the first time.
Riding horses together.
Talking horses and gymnastics.
Watching the Olympics, Kentucky Derby, etc., together.
Your natural loving way with animals.
The very first drawing you gave me. (It's still in my wallet)
Prescott adventures in the snow.
Adventures to the ocean.
You buried to your neck in the sand ;)
Cooking.
Our annual Nutcracker Suite ballets.
Jumping trampoline together.
Watching you dance.
You sharing the dances you made up with me.
The I Love Ba license plate that started it all...
Sharing your first true love with me.  Our talks about Jody.
Allowing, and trusting me to take you to the Dr. for birth control.
Watching your love for Jody grow in depth.
Your oh so refreshing and beautiful innocence.
The vibrant Life in you.
Your humor and wit.
Your vulnerability.
Laying upside on my lap...at all ages
Watching you...do anything.
Rubbing your back.
How we laughed...oh how we have laughed together.

Holding you in my arms...it's always the first time...again...and again...always the first time...holding you in my arms.

I love you, more than words can possibly express, Sweet Daughter of mine.
 


3 comments:

Meg Jenkins said...

I LOVE IT!! THANK YOU MAMA!!

estrella05azul said...

This is so beautiful!

Cynthia Fassett said...

Thank you, Estrella. More than anything else right now, I felt my daughter needed a public declaration, and affirmation of love, and how proud I am of her. She needed validation. Having recently been torn down in various ways, she needed to know that none of that crap is true, and that everything about her is exquisite. She needed a reminder that even in the dark, love is present, and always will be.